alzheimer's care

Unhelpful Comments to Primary Caregivers

Here is a collection of “helpful” comments that caregivers hate to hear:

  • “Wow, you look worn out!””

Uh, this is what sleep deprivation plus worry plus fear look like, thanks. You’re gorgeous, too!

  • “Oh my mom/sister/brother/grandfather had that, and it was awful!”

Hard to say which inspires more gorey stories, caregiving or childbirth. Which is ironic, considering that they both have sweet sides. I don’t need to be scared; I need to be empowered.

  • “I don’t think that’s the way you’re supposed to do it…”

But I’m doing it. See?

  • “I can tell you’re stressed…you’ve put on a little weight.”

Don’t. Tell. This. To. Anybody!

  • “How long does he have left?”

Show me your magic wand and I’ll show you my crystal ball. Let’s change the subject to something less depressing.

  • “Do you worry that you’ll get it too?”

Alzheimer’s/cancer/Parkinson’s/COPD/pneumonia/most diseases of old age aren’t contagious, like the flu. Let’s cope with one case at a time, please.

Heard any doozies yourself? Add to our list — or share how you respond to unhelpful comments.


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